Wednesday, November 16, 2011

The joy of Jesus dying on the cross is He knows through His offering to The Father , Heaven opens to all people, starting with His precious mother.  Mother Mary is the perfected human through God's grace that shines for us all to embrace and follow always to Jesus.  She loved Jesus first and most deeply.  The love of the mother for her son is only eclipsed by the love of the Son for His mother.

Friday, November 11, 2011

"My daughter, we should never forget that our self love is the last to die. While we remain in this base world we will always be affected by its sensitive assaults and hidden operations; but God's grace is sufficient for us not to willingly succumb. This virtue of detachment is so excellent that the old man in us, the man of sin, nor the senses, nor human nature with its natural faculties were ever capable of possessing it. Not even the Son of God, who as a Son of Adam, although without any stain of sin, was completely free. He too confessed to His apostles that His soul was full of sadness; He too sought consolation; He too did not wish to die. However, He preserved His detachment, and we too must try to preserve it in imitation of Him, in times of trial and suffering, in the faculties possessed by grace."~ St. Padre Pio

God is so great!

Thursday, November 10, 2011

A Post That Won't Last Long

Been awhile...many things happened and happening... 
Tired of it all, again...

Never have I felt so old by hearing it so often from others who I hold respect for.  Why bother?  They see me as old and washed up; even  job hunting sees me as another too old and with too few skills... grey and brown..

all is just brown and grey ... all i can manage to hope for today is that maybe, just maybe, at my death God has mercy and let's me hide away in some little space on the distant edges of Heaven... if i trust in hope in this tiny little bit for I know He is love and mercy maybe this life will not be lived in vain? 

How i wish i could feel love, last few months has erased it from my remembering...i know it as an intellectual exercise, a memory that is hazily remembered when listening to a certain song, or saying a certain prayer. A flicker when out in public watching people, walking by with a smile shared. sad, that is the only time i can feel it for now, a stranger's glancing smile...  Instead I just add more lashes and pain to His Pain ... for His pain is my pain... therefore i have to push on somehow even if it is dark and bleak and stuff the desire to just give up on it all away until it can be replaced with something more.