It has been a weird, rough few weeks spiritually.  Hard time sleeping, even harder focusing on my prayer life.  It seems like everything is a struggle, like trying to climb in high altitude without oxygen, tools, or training.  The more I try the further and more difficult the battle, the worse my bad habits want to win.  The more I feel so far away from God.  The more I have to remind myself "Trust in Jesus.  Trust in Mary, she will lead you to Jesus"  Oh but the struggle, the interior fight, the long drawn yearning and lost feeling.